Avis King

Avis King
December 31, 1922 to October 24, 2024
A life well-lived. It’s a common trope filled with the usual suspects like faith, family, hard work, helping others, all good and important things. Avis did all those things in spades. But her life is defined as much by what she didn’t do as what she did do. First, here’s some of what she did do.
Avis was born in 1922 in Harper Kansas. As a child she lived through the roaring 20s, but I doubt there was much roaring at that time in Harper Kansas. She spent her teenage years living through the great depression in the 1930s. When asked, she would reflect on those times not as a hardship but as a journey. She drove a tractor, ran from a bull, swam in a cow trough and was grateful for a Christmas where her only gifts were a ball and a handkerchief.
On June 6, 1943 in a Kansas flower garden, she married Harold King, the dashing red haired young man from Chicago who became the love of her life. Harold enlisted in the Navy and they moved to San Diego where they lived in an apartment overlooking the bay. Avis watched out the window as her new husband would sail out to an uncertain future. Every day she watched the harbour for signs that his ship was coming home.
After the war, with their first child in tow, they set out on their new life, part of an explosion of growth and changes in America.
She lived through McCarthyism, the fabulous 50s, the Kennedy’s, moon landings, Watergate, multiple other wars, the energy crisis, the fall of the Berlin wall, a world without Internet and so much more. All while raising five kids and saving enough money on her husband‘s middle class salary to put all 5 of her children through college while providing a home full of safety and love. Every morning there was a hot breakfast. She was the proofreader, the gardener, the cleaner, the seamstress and the emotional and spiritual core of the family. She was a clown, Strawberry the Clown, a real professional clown. And in the later years she loved a second life spending time with her 4 grandchildren.
There is so much more she did, but what stands out about Avis, our mother, is more what she didn’t do. She didn’t become bitter, although there were times where she was tempted. She didn’t become angry, raging against her perceived injustices. She didn’t let fear become her compass, her North Star. She never gave up, she never gave in to hate, and she never stopped trying to be a better person. And she never gave up on her faith.
Toward the end when she could no longer walk, she would sit in her recliner by a sunny window, falling asleep with an open Bible in her lap. She was always an active person, so she was not happy enduring the ravages of age, but she was at peace with her life and her next journey. And that is one of the greatest lessons she taught me – that true faith takes a lifetime. Salvation is free, but faith is earned. Like the parable of Jesus walking on the water.
It’s a familiar parable: Big storm, rocking boat, frightened disciples and Jesus walking toward them on the crashing waves. After Jesus called to him, Peter climbed out of the boat and took a few steps on the water before he became afraid and started to sink. Then Jesus took his hand lifting Peter up. And then the storm stopped. I always wondered why God didn’t stop the storm earlier or keep it from happening altogether because he must’ve known they would be frightened. Then after watching my mother live a lifetime of faith, I understood that the point wasn’t to stop the storm but to teach us not to fear the rain. To trust that God’s umbrella will be big enough.
Harold, her husband, wanted the epitaph on her gravestone to read “She pleased God.” And she did! Her favorite bible verse says “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him” (Hebrews 11:6). Avis wrote in her final wish list that if anyone asks how she wanted to be remembered, to say this: “She loved God, and her family, and she lived life to the fullest.”
She is survived by her children: Linda, Elise, Annie and Eric. And her grandchildren Jessica, Kate, Eli and Summer.
Now she’s reunited with her husband, her son, and lots of other friends and family. A well-earned rest until her next adventure.
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Thank you Mom for all the wonderful memories we have made through the years!
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I remember Aunt Avis from the many family get-togethers and her joy in life. One of our Hostetler reunions she had made a jump suit with large sunflowers. Her luggage didn’t come with her and she wore it for several days. We loved her.